Ode to Living by a High School and Middle School

Oh how I love the trash in my yard,
Chip bags and soda cans, whatever you discard.

Come and sit on my seawall, please don't think twice,
and screaming when my baby is sleeping is incredibly fun and nice.

If there is no room on the seawall, I have a seat for you.
It's on the bumper of my SUV- I promise I wont ask you to move.

It's really great at 7 and 2 when I have somewhere to be,
please ignore all of the no parking signs, and plant your car behind me.

I really love it when you hang in my yard, and closely examine my stuff,
Please look inside for anything you want, I'm sure I have enough.

I think the mail man may have delivered your mail to my place,
so check the mail box for stuff that's yours, it's really taking up space.

Don't hesitate to turn up your music for everyone to hear.
I don't own a tv,or radio- nothing fancy here.

By the way, I waited ALL summer to hear who you're in love with,
the idea that I don't care, would certainly be a myth.

And thanks for digging up my flowers I have planted in the bed,
I was going for the pretty look, but you're right, dirt works instead.

Underaged smoking and toking is legal at my place,
but if the cops come by you should put it away.. you know, just in case.

It's a blessing to watch you bully, and all the kids you taunt,
to see the outcome of undisciplined kids that get anything they want.

The best part about living in a house by the school,
the drama keeps life interesting, and the trash really is a jewel.

Haha

Yummies!

I let Alyssa feed herself today. But don't worry, I made sure to apologize to the high chair first. She had peas and spaghetti, then some canned fruit. She loved it!

Seven

Us when we were dating

Today I have been married for 7 years to the most amazing guy in the world. Every day he makes me smile, he makes me laugh, and sometimes he makes me poke my eyes out, (inside joke). I can't even begin to imagine my life without him. He never ceases to amaze me. Always willing to help someone out, and does it with a smile on his face. And speaking of his face, not only is it incredibly handsome, but it is also very kind. You can look in his eyes and see that he is very kind, and genuine, and trustworthy. I had no idea how much God would bless me when I was praying for a husband. I love you babe, my best friend, my husband!

Taking a Fall for a Good Cause

Anyone who doesn't know my daughter, has no idea how incredible intelligent she is. As you can see in the pictures, I have a huge layout for her, so I can get my work done, and she can be entertained. Well, she has figured out a couple ways to get me to gear my eye towards her instead.

Step 1. Things in the mouth.
As you can see, I have a cushy little rug for her to play on since we have all tile floors. I also put down a play mat from ikea that has a ton of cool bugs and stuff on it- that she refuses to look at. But lets focus our attention on the speckled rug. She has figured out how to pull all of the little speckle peices out and put them in her mouth, thus me having to get up, and take it out of her mouth- giving her a good reason to cry and therefore, me having to pick her up to calm her down.

This is when I thought I was being the smart one, and replacing this rug with her room rug... or was I being smart?

Step 2. Taking the plunge.
She has gotten very good at standing up- and even better as using this to her advantage. She will stand up- exhibit A. Then she will look back to see if there is anything behind her, look at me to make sure I'm not looking, then fall down and cry- exhibit B. Thus leads to me picking her up, to comfort her.
Exhibit A

Exhibit B


Step 3. "Sleeping"
Next thing she tries is pretend sleeping. She has started this since I started putting her in time out. She will lay there very still, and very quiet. Then I go to pick her up to put her in bed, or in her swing, and she usually will "wake up" and be so happy and wide awake. So, I go to put her down, and she starts to scream. Other times, she will stay "alseep" and I put her down and that is when she decides to "wake up" and sometimes she will play in her swing with the little toys, and other times she just cries. I seem to have outsmarted her on this one, so she will lay there silently as long as she can, then just start crying so I will.... drum roll please....... Pick her up.


Finally she does give in, and decides that maybe a nap is the best option... or is it? The world may never know!

Some More of my Favorite Things

Ok, so I'm not a big fan of raindrops on roses, or whiskers on kittens, but I left off some of my favorite things yesterday, and I sort of felt bad about it... so here is list #2 of my favorite things.
1. My whole Family... my parents and my brother have seen me through a lot, and I will always love them.
Forgive me please, I can't find a picture of all of them right now.

2. Writing... I love to write. It has always been theripudic for me. I am actually in the process of writing a childrens book, but I put it down a while ago, with many revisions that needed to be made, and haven't picked it back up again. I think it would be so cool to be the author of childrens books. Those are my favorite kind anyways- I don't really get into novels. I also write poetry and lyrics. Writing has always been a passion of mine, and can't believe that I left it off.


3. My Kitties.... Boog and Taco. The wierdest cats that you will ever meet. Boog is big and a little dumb, and taco is really needy, but I love them both.
Boog

Taco
4. My friends... I don't really have pictures, because I would be uploading like crazy, but I cherish my friends so much. There is nothing like having a good friend to lean on when you need it.
So thats all for now. I may still be uploading this list- once I think of more.

Some of My Favorite Things

So I have been kinda down lately... stress from my job, and struggling with that, and having the baby at home with me has been pretty difficult, and a couple deaths, including my grandma. Then I find this blog that I posted the other day, and I literally cannot get it off my mind... so I have been trying to perk myself up, so I decided to let you know some of my favorite things in my life.

1. Jesus... He died for me, a humiliating death at that, and then He rose from the grave and saves everyone who choose Him. That's pretty cool. And He continues to help me everyday of my life. Even when I don't deserve His love.


2. My Husband.. This goes without saying that he is the perfect guy for me. I love him, and would do anything for him, and I know that he would do anything for me. He is by far my best friend ever, and no one in this world knows just how silly we are. I love him.


3.My Daughter... Obviously. Shes so cute, and loving. She has a 1 in a million personality. You gotta love her past her drama...lol.


Now that we got the obvious out of the way....

4. Laughing... They say it's the best excersise, I don't know about that, but I love anything that can make me laugh.
5. Plumeria... my all time favorite flower, and you want to know how many I have?, 0! One day when we buy a house, I am going to plant a tree, so I can look at (and smell) Plumeria all the time.


6. All things Hawaii.. this and plumeria go hand in hand. I love Hawaii, because it is so full of culture. The people there- even though they hate tourists- are so loving, and deeply in love with their family and their beliefs. One day I plan on having a vacation home there, so I can go back whenever I want.


7. The Waltons... don't ask me why, it's just one of my obsessions


8. Japanese People... One of my goals in life is to go to Tokyo- but before I do, I want to be fluent in Japanese


9.Photography... I believe that just about everything is art, and I wish that people viewed the world as everything being something to cherish.


10. Marilyn Monroe... not that I would have desired her life, but she was classically beautiful, and thats how I look at her

My heart has been wrenched!

I was on Facebook the other day, and you know sometimes you go to someones page, and then you see someone that you know so you go to their page, and it goes on and on until your in someones page that you have never met before? Well I had that experience. I saw on someone's page- Praying for the Sullenger Family with this picture of the cutest little girl. I knew I may regret it but I opened it anyways, and this was the first picture that I saw.


http://patrickandashley.blogspot.com/

My heart dropped, and I immediately started crying, and I had no idea what this blog would say, but I knew in my heart, that it would change me- and it did. I read on through the past week of trauma that this family has been through. This little girl- 18 months old fell into a canal in Rigby ID, and suffered from brain damage. They would give updates at least once a day, with such hope, then on July 15 she went to be with the Lord.

I cannot even begin to imagine how they feel. Their baby, who was once full of energy and life, was gone, and now when they wake up in the morning it is silent. When they go to bed- silence. When they have to make a phone call, or watch what they want on tv- nothing. My heart aches for them in no way that I would have ever imagined for a family.

I don't know why either. I have heard of plenty of kids that have died. I have had family that have gone, but my heart just aches, day in and day out. I think maybe because to me she looks a little bit like Alyssa in some of her other pics. I don't know. But when I say it changed me- it did.

Everytime I look at my precious little girl, I think of this mother (Ashley) and I think about what she is doing at this very moment. Is she breaking down, is she looking at pictures, is she sorting through Preslee's things to give away, or to store? Is she sitting in Preslee's room holding her toys? Is she trying to move on by continuing to work, and be with family, and laugh and joke around. I don't know why I think about it so much, but I can't stop. What would I do in that situation. I don't even want to imagine. If you have a minute you should read their blog- http://patrickandashley.blogspot.com/. Her testimony of God through all of this is absolutely amazing. I feel like through this, she is stronger, and encouraging me, even though my daughter is alive and well.

But sometimes you go through situations in life, and you don't know how you make it through, but you do. Everytime I hold my baby now, I cherish her. I thank God that I have another day to hold her. The other day, she woke up at 4 am, and even though I was annoyed, this other mother ran through my mind, and I had to remind myself, that she would do anything to be in my shoes at this very moment. I need to always remember that, and I hope and pray that I will never forget how I have felt in this last week.

I told you so...

Ok, so I told you that I was going to be a bad blogger. Just- things happen, and they are just a part of life. They might make you happy or sad or mad, or whatever, but you don't think about telling the world. Usually I put updates on Facebook, and forget about Blogger. So- updates-:

Ayssa is CRAWLING!!!!!! YAY!!!!!
She looks like she's dancing when she does it. It's so funny and cute. It's really hard to describe, but it almost looks like she is floating, and doesn't know what to do with her arms and legs. We have a video on Chris's phone, and if our lives ever slow down, I will try to get it posted up on here. I can't really think of any other updates for right now, but I will let you know. Things have been pretty stressful with my job. Everybody thinks because I work from home, that I just sit here all day, and relax... well, thats not the case at all. I'm not going to go into too many details, but lets just say that I am getting the raw end of the deal a lot of times. And Alyssa doesnt want me to work when she is here. Oh well, things are going to get better soon, I just know it. :)

Life Happens Fast

I haven't blogged in a long time- Yo, this one's for you. It's funny, because even though life has escaped me in the last month, I really haven't had anything to blog about, so I will update you on everything.

May 5 was my birthday (also Cinco de Mayo). I choose to spend every year that I can doing something Mexican. Not last year, because morning sickness, and mexican dont mix very well. This year we went to a new local restaraunt called Panchos. They had a mariachi band there. I can say that all of the Cinco de Mayos I have spent in many different Mexican restaraunts, this was the first time they actually had a mariachi band there. It was pretty cool. They went around table to table asking for requests. Of course, Chris made them sing Feliz Cumpleanos to me. But it was pretty funny because here I am in the middle of Auburndale- with all of the rednecks (there was only about 5 Mexicans in the whole restaraunt) and the band is asking them for requests. So no one knows what to request. You could see the nervousness in the people's face before they got to the table, trying to think of any song thats Mexican or Spanish that they possibly could. I was actually pretty shocked that they didnt do the same songs over and over. It was a good thing that there were a couple Mexicans there to break up the "cheesy wedding line-up". It was funny though.

Alyssa is growing everyday. Despite her Dr's wishes, I started her on real food. I love love love making her food. I knew that was something I wanted to do, but I never expected to get so much enjoyment out of it. The other day I bought a sweet potato for a buck, and ended up with enough for 21 days. I was amazed, because thats like big savings. Plus, I look around the store, and all of the possibilities. I buy frozed fruits and veggies, and some fresh, cook them if needed, puree them, put them in ice cube trays and freeze them. Then I know that what I am feeding her is 100% natural, and no preservatives. I went by the old- give them green veggies first, then orange ones. The problem was that she liked the green veggies, then I stared giving her orange, and now she wont eat the green. Jokes on her though because I stared mixing them together.

She also is sitting up now. She really just one day, could sit up. It wasnt really anything that I worked on with her, she just could. Pretty crazy. She will be crawling soon. She braces herself up, and you can tell that she knows what to do, and that she can get around herself if she does it, but she cant figure out how to do it. Im thinking sometime in the next couple weeks. That will be good, because I can start keeping her home with me, because she can pretty much entertain herself. Crazy expectations, I know, but I do have hope.

Lets see, jobs going ok, family is doing well... not too much after that. My grandma's health is quickly decreasing. Its kind of sad since I just lost my other grandma a few months ago. But thats how it goes sometimes. She is in peace, and ready to go, and I can respect that. I will miss her, and even though I would love it if she would live forever, thats just not reality.

Well, I think that is it for now. I will be blogging again soon, I'm sure.

Gram K

My Grandma- Strong, Loving, Joking, Talker, Experienced, Beautiful Heart, Traveler, Animal Lover, Golf Lover, Football Lover, Card Player, Granddaughter, Daughter, Sister, Neice, Wife, Mother, Grandmother, Great Grandmother, Great Great Grandmother. December 7, 1915, Eunice Clark (later Kazmaier) entered the world, a tiny, innocent baby. At that moment in time, she had no idea what she may see in her lifetime. As a teenager, and into her 20's she saw through the great depression. A time when all you had was your family to fall back on. On her own birthday in 1941, Pearl Harbor was attacked dunring World War II. She saw the crazy fans that Elvis drew in, and watched as Neil Armstrong became the first man on the moon in 1969. She lived through her children becoming hippies in the late 60's to the 70's. She saw the world become materialistic in the 80's. She can remember World War II, the Korean war, the Vietnam War, the War in Iraq, and many others. She may have been one that paniced as Y2K was approaching. She lived to see the first black President of the United States. She has traveled all over the world. Europe, China, Egypt. Met a young man named Helmut in Germany, later finding out that he is really a part of our family. It would be a dream of mine, to borrow her memory drawer.


She has always love to share about her experiences in life. As a joke, the grankids used to say smile and nod. Her stories were always long, but now that I look back, I am so thankful that she shared them. I am amongst few that can tell you where my family really comes from. I can go back in time in my mind, and see some of the things that she experienced, and family that was long gone before I was even thought of. As a young girl, she tought me how to do everything from crafts, to gambling. She was always versitile, and always doing something.


The most important thing in the world to her is her family. She has 4 children, 23 grand children, 28 great grandchildren, and 5 great great grandchildren. She is known as Eunice, Mom, Gram and GG. She's loved by all that come in contact with her. Her body is old, but her heart is young. She loves life, and all things that God has put in her path. Though she's not gone, I know that someday she will be. When she is, she will be greatly missed. But she leaves behind a legacy, that no ordinary person can exceed. She will leave behind a gift for the world to want to do better. And I believe in my heart, that at least my world is a better place because of knowing her. I love you Gram.

Auburndale outing

We decided on Saturday that it was such a beautiful day that we would take Alyssa to the park. Well, on the way there, we stopped to talk to the ducks. As we were talking to the ducks, the camara ran out of battery. So we walked over to the camara store, and while we were over there, we saw a small petting zoo set up. It was pretty cool, because she got to pet the goats, and sit on a horse. We ended up walking all over town. It was such a great day!

My life in a nutshell- a long blog

So I figured it was about time for me to tell you a little bit about myself. I was born and raised in Perrysburg Ohio. I thought I would be there forever, but when I was 16, my parents decided to move to Fla. I told them before I moved that if I saw 1 roach, I was moving back wit h my grandparents. Well, 877,546,054 roaches later, I still live here. I love it. Mind you, I miss the seasons, but you can't beat the friendships I have made, and going to the beach whenever I want. Besides, I met Chris here. I met him at church like within a few weeks of living here. We literally hated each other, and use to fight all the time.. even physically. People use to say, what about Chris? And I would say... "no, I will never date Chris Williams!" God had a plan the whole time, and was probably sitting up there cracking up. He started asking me out a couple times, and I would politely refuse. I even had a crush on his best friend, so I used that as an excuse. So he finally gave up, and as soon as he did, I knew in my hear that he was the one. I kinda knew before, but never really let my feelings to the for front. Then one day, he decided to go to a different church, and I was afraid that he would meet someone else there, so I expressed my feelings, and 7 and a half years later, we are as happy as we can be. That's not to say we haven't had our rough times. The first year was pretty hard. I lost my job right after I came back from our honeymoon. I was out of work for 3 months, and he only made 8.50 an hour. At that first moment in our lives together, we realized that we were going to have situations that would either make or break our marriage. I think that's what happens to a lot of marriages, is that they say for better or worse, but don't really mean it. You can't just run away from your problems. You have to make the decision to build your character from the bad times. Another thing is that people have this "me" mentality, and they don't realize the other person in the room. That's why I feel so blessed to have him. When I did finally get a job, it was working a a juvenile correction center for boys. I worked the night shift, so we never got to spend any time together. Not to mention, that working in a place like that can really do something to your psyche. While I was working there- 5 months after marriage, we were robbed. Of course the things they took weren't really that important, but they took our sense of security. After that, we had to move into his parents house. It was only for a couple weeks while we found a place, but for newly weds, it felt like an eternity. After we moved, life calmed down quite a bit.

Then about 3 years into marriage, after unsuccessfully trying to get pregnant, I was told that I may never have children. Having always wanted to be a wife and mother, that ripped my heart to shreds. We didn't have money for fertility treatments, or adoption, but there was nothing that I could do. I could say that I was in a depression for a long time after that, but that would be an understatement. I was just plain sad... all of the time. I wore a happy mask, but on the inside I wanted to cry, always. I would plead with God, and cry, and pray all of the time. I couldn't even begin to tell you how many people prayed for me. I thought I had done something, and God wouldn't forgive me for it, or he thought that I didn't deserve them. I felt very rejected, and that was the only word I had to describe the way I felt. People used to say- oh, God can heal you, all it takes is faith. I knew that God could heal me, but I didn't know that he would. I knew people that God could have healed of cancer that still died.

One day, during worship time at church, I, like always, was begging God to heal me. All of the sudden, with a clear voice He said "Emily, you want a child more than you want me." I knew it was true, but I didn't know how to change that. He said it to me over and over for a while. So finally I said "Well God, then help me to want you more." Over time, I began to fast, and made sure that I was worshiping him, and not whining for my own selfish desires.
February 6, 2009, I was at a youth service, and they were singing the Lifehouse song "Everything". I was worshiping God, and all of the sudded, again, in a clear voice I hear "Emily, just accept your healing." I stopped dead in my track- could this be true? Could this be the moment? I didn't know what to think. He said it again. Then I thought of the woman with the issue of blood. That was literally me. She physically touched his robe, and was instantly healed. And I said "God, if I could just touch your hem, like the woman in the Bible, I know I would be healed." Then I got this overwhelming feeling all over my whole body. It felt like when you lift up a sheet, and just let it fall on you, that amazingly good feeling. I felt that over my entire body. I just cried, and God said, you can have more than the hem, you can have the whole thing. That was February 6, and on February 16, we conceived our first daughter, Alyssa Grace. Her middle name is Grace, because it's by God's grace, and love that she is here. He is so good! So here I am, a wife and mother, just as I always wanted to be. People think I'm crazy when I say that we want like 3 or 4, but they have no idea how much I love being a mom. So, thats my story, and it's not even over yet!!

Season's change

Things in life are always changing. Everything in life comes for a season. Sometimes life just doesn't seem fair. God has a way of making us uncomfortable. I guess it's to remind us that he is there to rely on him. It seems like when your life is going on as normal, something comes along and jogs it up a little. It is those times when we do need to turn to God. I believe that he knows why things happen. Sometimes when you have the blues, just ask God to wrap his arms around you. He is like a teddy bear. He loves you, and wants that closeness with you. God is so amazing! Even when people come and go in your life, and you don't really know why, he does, and he has a plan. The grass will get greener. I promise..... saying that to myself.

Parksdale Farms

We took our annual trip over to Plant City today to Parsdale Farms. Let me tell you, it is AWESOME!!!! You go there, and stand in this huge line, and you better know what you want before you get up to order. They are seriously like the soup nazis of the strawberry world. Of course they have to be, because the lines are crazy.

It's not a major thing to go, but it is sort of fun! We wanted to take Alyssa there. Shoot, as I'm typingt his I remembered that the Strawberry Queen was there, and I was going to get a pic with her. Oh well. So we took Alyssa there, and she looked so cute, because she had on her Strawberry Shortcake dress, with a strawberry bib. Even though it really meant nothing to her. She will enjoy it when she gets a little older.

I will have to post more later, because blogger is messed up, and wont upload rright now, but more to come..... I promise.

Crazy thoughts

So I'm laying awake last night from 3-5:30, when suddenly I get a song in my head that I sang during chior class in 5th grade. We sang it a lot, but the song didn't make any sense. Here are the lyrics:

It is midnight, it is midnight
the sun is shining brightly
And the car is racing slowly down the river
it is hot, very hot, it is very, very hot
And yet I shiver.

Yes, that was the song. And Mr Borgelt (the chior teacher) prcoeeded to tell us that the band was high when they wrote it. How old was I again? 10? I just thought that was funny. And like I say, we sang it a lot. Hmmm, Mr B, maybe not such a good lesson for a bunch of 10 year olds. Of course we all thought we were cool for knowing a druggie song. Oh, those were the days. LOL